Loss of purpose, chronic pain, no hope, distorted thinking, escape, punishing somebody else, the list is lengthy. They are the reasons why somebody can be willing to take their own life. It happens far too much.
It is hard to truly say that you can empathize unless you have been there yourself. The point of contemplating suicide is a lonely and desperate position. Usually it is done with a focus on what is wrong with the world. It doesn’t consider seriously enough what lies beyond death.
Why isn’t taking our own life our prerogative? It is our pain. It is our body.
Suicide leaves pain and guilt in its wake. It is a sin against others. As humans we are uniquely important to God and His work in the world. Suicide does not trust God to work even through bad circumstances. Suicide does not imagine the God-given purposes that will be left undone. Suicide is therefore sin.
Is it an automatically damning sin? Proponents of this view misunderstand the nature of grace. When we are connected to Jesus through faith and baptism, the sins of our whole life are covered by the death of Jesus. While we are commanded to confess our sins and offered ongoing forgiveness of sins, this doesn’t mean that grace is parceled out to us. It is not necessary that the last thing we do is receive forgiveness. Being sinners, it is highly likely that the last thing we do is sin, even if the sin is not suicide. So suicide isn’t necessarily damning because it is the last thing you do.
Suicide may speak poorly of your connection to God. A suicidal person may have rejected God, grace, or have fallen away, but we are not in position to judge that. A saved person destined for Heaven could commit suicide, but at a cost. Salvation depends on Jesus alone. We are saved by grace. God still does judge our deeds or the lack of them. This is part of the Judgment Day experience. Suicide will cost you at least part of your reward. 1 Corinthians 3:11-15 speaks of this:
For no one can lay a foundation other than that which is laid, which is Jesus Christ. Now if anyone builds on this foundation with gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, straw–each one’s work will become manifest, for the Day will disclose it, because it will be revealed by fire, and fire will test what sort of work each one has done. If the work that anyone has built on the foundation survives, he will receive a reward. If anyone’s work is burned up, he will suffer loss, though he himself will be saved, but only as through fire.
Is it ever worth escaping current miserable conditions if it means abandoning part of what God has prepared for us to do and passing on a part of an eternal reward? We do well to understand what our lives mean to God. What is our purpose. If we are alive, we still have a purpose. Ask God to help you to identify it, if you are unsure. Painful situations are often ripe opportunities to do the work of God. Others don’t have to love you. God loves you. The best advice is to become outward rather than inward focused. Your value is assured by a connection to Jesus. Make every moment of life worthy of your eternal calling.